If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

Its no news update, that I hardly ever sleep at night. I toss and turn until all hours, while Andrea snores loud enough to shake the windows right beside me. I usually begin to find slumber a few hours before daylight. Which is a problem because Abe has to get up at daylight to catch the school bus.

My clock goes off at 5:30 am, evidently in my best sleepy stupor, I knock it off the bedside table. I wake up to a cat sitting on my chest, pawing me in the face. Satan cat wants to be fed. I reach for the clock, noting that its not where it should be. I frantically dive bomb the floor searching for the clock. The neon light blinks across the darkened curtains- 6:24! I jump out of bed, we can do this- we can beat the bus!

I begin calling out, "Abe" "Abe" more urgent "ABRAMHAM!!" I stumble to his room, his bed is empty. I have one hysterical moment of thinking where is my child. Oh wait he wanted to sleep in the guest room, he likes the bed better than his. I stumble to the guest room, I yank off his blanket. "Abe get up its almost 6:30." He flies into motion, throwing on clothes, and tying his shoes. I run down the stairs in my night gown, pulling it off as I run down the stairs- not the best idea I have ever had. I go careening into the downstairs bathroom door. "That's going to leave a mark." We literally run to the bus stop, after I have shoved a poptart in his hand, and strapped his backpack to him. Yes, I won't be winning the best mother award today.

Luckily the rest of my morning happens a little more smoothly. Van goes of to choir, and I head back to the house to get ready for our appt at NCCRM (The reproductive clinic). We had been debating back and forth whether to knock me up at home, or go to the office and have an IUI done. I believe the office procedure has won, after telling Andrea the procedure, and showing her the cath and attachment she said, "You want me to stick that where, and push what?" Not so great in medical situations that one.

To the office we go. We had been referred by our regular OB, so this was our first time in the office. Its bad enough to be anxious and going through a new situation- but why must it be like 10 degrees inside the office. So I am freezing going through the health assessment history- Check- two normal births, and pregnancies. Check- no fertility treatments before. Check- big ole lesbian. Yes, they asked. Check- How many times a week do you have sex, Andrea watching over my shoulder whispers- "Put four." I say, "Dear it doesn't really matter how many times a week we have sex, you realize that?" She frowns, "Can't you make a daddy look good." Really? Haha.

So they usher us back to a waiting room after doing the precursory assessment. In walks a large Jamaican man- "How you all be doing today ladies?" Umm ok something I wasn't expecting but whatever. He gives us the run down about IUIs, clomid, and our chances of conception. He holds up a picture of my ovaries, "These be some great looking ovaries, perfect tubes- great pelvic floor width. You are an optimal patient." Did you just tell me my ovaries were beautiful? Thanks I guess. "Percentage wise, you should have no trouble, no trouble at all. I would give you a better than 50% chance of getting pregnant the first cycle." I am thinking great that's what I like to hear, turns out my body is an overachiever as well.

Then he gets sort of serious look and says, we will add the clomid just to increase ovulation. Do you have twins in your family?" I answer, "Yes, three sets of twins. The closest are my neice and nephew." He blows out a breath, "Well we will do an ultrasound to make sure that you don't have like 10 eggs in there with the clomid. Your chances of multiples are about 40%" Andrea the joker says, "Yeah we don't want to be the octomoms." He laughs, a big deep belly laugh. "You know that's right." Andrea and the doctor get really chummy over the visit. Bantering jokes back and forth at one another. By the end of the visit Andrea says, "So level with me doc- how many times do we have to do it at home before we are successful?" Another loud deep laugh, "Don't ya know that's what I am here for."

So we proceed forward, with much encouragement and good ju ju from the Doctor.